The Great Geary's Transport of 2008

So what I failed to discuss in my last post was how the weekend ended. I had intentionally stashed 6 Geary's (2 Hampshire Ales, 2 Summer Ales, and 2 Winter Ales.) to bring home to my buddy in Bradenton. We will call him Mr. Crabs. For those who are not familiar with SpongeBob Square Pants, Mr. Crabs favorite saying is Money, money, money, money. That pretty much describes him. His wife loves the Yankees and ShitYard. So even though she is a dear friend you will not hear much about her in my posts. Just kidding! (Side note: From now on GrapeApe is to be called Patrick from SpongeBob. The GrapeApe nickname was retired years ago and Patrick works better. BigFoot is SquidWard and I am SpongeBob. But BigFoot will always be BigFoot!)

My long lost cousin Nate found the stash even though I hid it under the ginormous trash bag of empties. So when I awoke on Sunday morning to find that all but the 2 Winters were gone I knew I had to to do something. The first stop of the day was at Dunkin Donuts so my lovely wife and I could get coffee and Everything Bagels. Their was a convenience store attached to the DD but they didn't have any Summer Ale. So on we stopped at the Forest Ave. Hannaford Bros. Our favorite Hannaford Bros ever. The 6 pack of Summer Ale was $8.99. The Brewer's Choice 12 pack with 3 Summer Ales, 3 London Porter's, 3 Pale Ales, and 3 HSA was only $12.99. So now I had a dilemma. Could I transport the remaining 2 Winter's plus the 12 pack? 14 beers in a suitcase? Well I couldn't pass up that challenge and Mr. Crabs wouldn't forgive me if I only showed up with 2 beers. Plus he would have quickly done the math on the 12 pack vs. 6 pack price and seen the bargain of 6 more beers for $4. I really had no choice. So with the 12 beers still packed in the box with my t-shirts (yes they were clean) stuffed in around them and the 2 Winter's wrapped in my nicest shirts I showed up at the airport. My suitcase went from weighing 27 pounds to 47 pounds. I have told you before these are heavy beers but they are even heavier than I realized. Ok so maybe it is the thick bottles...but I am chalking it up to beer weight.

The transport went great and there was only 1 challenge left. To get the beer from Miami to Bradenton. I kept the beer in the fridge all week as I didn't want it to undergo too many temperature changes. On the drive to Bradenton I put the beer at the foot of the passenger seat and kept the passenger side colder for the whole trip. I arrive at Mr. Crabs house and delivered the beer to the new garage beer fridge. Mr. Crabs was so happy he even let me drink 2 of the Geary's this weekend. Good times.

So I set a modern day record for airplane beer delivery. The reason for the modern day and airplane caveats are as follows:

1) Prior to the limitations on liquids on planes I brought a case of Geary's HSA on the plane as my carry on. 24 beers made it to the TPA parking garage. 23 beer and 1 pair of wife my wife's ripped pants left. She somehow ripped the entire ass seam in her pants and dropped the case. Mr. Crabs and I were not sure what to do; Ask if she is ok or stare in astonishment that she would drop the case of HSA and check to see how many made it. Lucky for me I recovered fairly quickly and checked on her as we were still in the courting stage. I really did feel bad for her. She knew how much Mr. Crabs valued that beer and how much work I put into carrying it every where. Plus she was out a pair of pants and a tad embarrassed.

2)When discussing non-airplane delivery I have to give a shout out to Dad and Trish (I assume she is in a better place right now but somehow will know I am writing this.) as they brought 2 cases of HSA last year from Maine to Miami in the back of the Tundra. Not in the truck bed but in the cab. They know how to treat beer. I then brought a case to Mr. Crabs as his Christmas present. He mentioned that it might be his best Christmas present ever. No offense Yankee Fan ShitYard drinking wife.

So that was the Great Geary's Transport of April 2008.