I do have numerous stories of the random travelers I encounter; the 2 anxiety pills popping sleeping on my shoulder flatulent guy on the way to Vegas whose North Shore (pretty sure she was from Revere) sister insists on telling me her life story including the fact she is going to Vegas for a funeral, the 10 year old kid who thinks kicking my seat is funny, the old lady who while in the longest security line keeps saying move your bones whenever there was a 3 foot gap in front of me. We all run into the "rookie" travelers though so I try look at this as part of the deal.
This is rather long post as it is pretty hard to describe all that happened succinctly.
I was heading from Miami to Chicago for a conference. The best price I could find sent me through Charlotte on US Airways from MIA to CLT and on United to Ohare. I do try to be frugal with my companies money. That might stop after this trip.
Tuesday MIA to CLT (that is short for Charlotte not a female body part): We leave 25 minutes late due to a wind shift shortly before take off. What would happen if we had already started our takeoff and the wind shifted?
We land in CLT and I sprint from the US Airways terminal to the United terminal.
CLT to ORD: Board the flight and realize that they are waiting for another US Airways flight with a bunch of people connecting. Sweet my luggage will be safe. They have 30 minutes. What could possibly go wrong.
ORD: The people who boarded after me all got their luggage but mine didn't arrive. Something about US Airways to United was mentioned and that no one was sure where my luggage was but most likely it was still in CLT. The United luggage agent was very friendly and told me to go buy new clothes for tomorrow and United would reimburse me. Only one SMALL problem with that. It was almost 10PM and the conference started at 7:00 AM the following morning.
I was told my boss to use a suburban taxi or car service as they are flat rates. I knew the hotel was a little ways from the airport but at one point I text messaged Critracer that I was either being brought into the woods to be killed by my Serbian cabbie (could not understand a word he was saying) or my conference was in Milwaukee. He did offer to call 911 which was nice.
For day one of the conference I wore the same exact clothes I wore the day before. Yup all of them. A gentle reminder Miami is hot this time of year and I had been all over the place in the same exact outfit I was wearing. ARRRFFF I think I am just going to throw the underwear away.
My luggage did arrive at 2PM the next day at the hotel and I eventually got to shower and change and best of all put on clean underwear. I only got $50 in vouchers to United but the Indian customer service rep was nice enough to admit that if I had been able to get new clothes with time stamped receipts I would have been reimbursed for those purchases plus the $50 credit. Note to all: If you lose your luggage claim that your most important meeting of the year is the next day and you can to attend without a new suit. A $1000 suit of course. I should have skipped the opening of the conference but I am sure my boss would have been a tad peeved when standing at the booth alone with 150 people asking to have their Passports stamped. (This is a phenomenon you must see.)
Friday ORD to CLT or BIA or FLL or MIA: My flight to CLT is at 1:50 and I get to the airport at 11:30. The Serbian cabbie mumbles something about weather but I forgot to bring my handy Serbian to English dictionary so that didn't help. Checking in I see my flight is delayed 25 minutes. No worries. Go through security and check the board and I now see that my flight is delayed until 3:10. This could be troublesome. I call US Airways and they find me a later flight from CLT to MIA on American Eagle. Still relaxed so I walk from Terminal 1 to Terminal 3 to have lunch with my boss who is delayed as well. This is where the fun starts:
I started on the right hand side of Terminal 1 (blue), AA is in the 3rd prong of 3 (green), the first United gate I went to is at the end of the left hand prong of 2 and US Airways is at the end of the right hand prong. You can not go directly across without going through security again.
THERE ARE NO PEOPLE MOVERS
Terminal 1 to 2 to 3: Pedometer reading 60,000 steps
I notice a flight leaving for Charlotte in 25 minutes so I go looking for a United rep in case I can go standby. Bypassing the line of 100 people waiting to talk with the Customer Service desk I make my way to the gate where the flight is leaving and chat with the gate agent. This of course is 1/2 a mile into terminal 2. There is nothing they can do for me and I am better off waiting for my initial flight. Walk all the way out into Terminal 3 in search of my boss for lunch.
Terminal 3 to 1: Pedometer reading 100,000 steps plus burned off the beer from lunch.
Head towards the gate and find out my flight is delayed until 4:22. No way to make my connection now. I call US Airways on my cell and they inform me the plane that is supposed to take me to CLT has not left Houston. As a side note she did inform me that all the other United flights going to CLT were fine, but of course booked. Helpul, very helpful. 15 minutes later she decides my best bet would be an American Airlines flight direct to MIA. Sweet and the flight is going to leave around 5:30 Central so I should be in MIA by 9:30 Eastern. The lady on the phone said all that was left to do was walk to a US Airways gate and chat with an agent and they will be able to print my ticket to AA for me.
Terminal 1 to 2: Pedometer reading: 125,000 steps. 3 blisters and definitely worked off the beer and the burger.
I ask an airport employee where US Airways is and they say terminal 2. Alright head back there and once again all the way into terminal 2 to find the ONE US Airways gate in all of Ohare. They tell me they can not do anything until United removes me as being checked in to their flight.Can 2 people from the same company get their stories straight? 25 minutes of phone time with United and I get this accomplished. He did try to tell me that because I booked the flight through US Airways, that US Airways needed to remove me. I fought through this and he got me removed. Back to the US Airways gate, the guy punches in some numbers and says I am all set but I will have to go to an AA gate to get my pass printed out.
Terminal 2 to 3: 175,000 steps, 2 more blisters for a total of 5 and dehydration is setting in. Rather upset I wore dress shoes instead of sneakers.
I go to gate 15 where my flight leaves from and they say I have to wait until they process the current flight. I wander to another AA gate and he says yup I see that you are confirmed for a seat but US Airways hasn't pushed the ticket over. He tells me to call them and they should be able to take care of that. OK easy enough right.
I call US Airways and after pushing 10 buttons and saying agent 5 times I speak to a human again. She proceeds to claim I am not in their system. She can not find me with my confirmation #, name or destination. I calmly let her know that the previous agent found me with my last name and my route. She refuses and says I need my flight # from CLT to MIA. So I dig around and finally find that. As soon as she finds me she proceeds to contradict everything that I have been told before. Of course, what was I thinking trusting the other US Airways employees.
I tried to remain patient and explain that she was contradicting everything the gate agent and the other US Airways rep told me. I calmly remind her I purchased these flights through US Airways. She didn't budge, and kept spouting off about procedures and how this was United's issue and they screwed up. I tried to be nice and explain my predicament at least 4 times. No movement on her part. I try all my moves, she is not impressed. Glad I never tried to pick her up in a bar.
I pull the "may I speak with your supervisor" card and of course her immediate retort is he will tell you exactly what I just told you. Listen lady, AA says I am already confirmed, United has removed me from their flight, US Airways (well everyone except you) says I am all set why can you not just push the ticket over. She insists I will have to go to the ONE Us Airways gate.
Terminal 3 to 2: Pedometer reading 205,000 steps and 1 more new blister and oh, what are those, yup shin splints. Feeling the initial symptoms of heat exhaustion.
She puts me on hold and after being on hold for 10 minutes I figure I should start the 15 minute walk back to the US Airways gate in Terminal 2. She comes on at one point during my walk and says the Supervisor is trying to help me. I get to the US Airways gate at the very moment she comes back on the phone. Apparently I was supposed to be impressed with her as proudly claimed "we get you on the AA flight that was supposed to leave at 6:05 and is now scheduled for 8:20". Wait a sec0nd, I was just at an AA gate and they said I was confirmed for the earlier flight. She claimed they had never heard of me. Dear god! So what you are telling me is you guys managed to screw this up and had to backtrack to help me.
Terminal 2 to 3: 228,000 steps, 3 more blisters and blood pressure way to high! Feet killing me, shins screaming. Must have beer and an ice massage.
2 quick Sam Adams calmed me down but after a lengthy internal argument I decided against taking off my shoes and rubbing ice on my feet. I finally board at 7:45 Central. Pilot lets us know we are 2nd in line. Sweet....oh wait there is another line of storms rolling through but he thinks we can get out. But of course with the storms the wind direction changed so we had to go to the other end of the runway so suddenly we are somewhere between 10th and 20th in line.
Saturday morning MIA AA to United to Car: Pedometer reading 315,000 steps a new personal best in dress shoes!
I arrive at 12:15 eastern time at the AA terminal. I need to go search for my luggage. AA is concourse C, United who still had control of my luggage is Concourse J and due to construction there are no people movers. So a 15 minute walk later my trip came to an end as I was rewarded by United having switched my bag to a different flight and it was just sitting there in the United office waiting for me. See good things do come to those who wait. Of course I was parked the furthest away I could be in the Dolphin garage from United but oh well I was almost home.
So let see, 315,000 steps (this morning it feels like about 8 miles) 8 blisters and I am back in the sweat box we call a house. Good times.
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